Ready

My body and mind are ready to be finish with all the stress that this process has brought to me.

My incisions are finally all healed up and I am back to normal. I dream that by October I have gotten my period on my own and am pregnant!! I am not sure that I should get my goal so high to maybe just be let down in the end!! I just really have faith that this surgery will work out for us. I now know that everything inside my body looks good, so it is just a matter of actually getting my period on my own now.

I received letter from the doctor on Wednesday! It read...."Dear Vanessa: The Laparoscopy showed classic polycystic ovaries. Each ovaries was drilled ten times. No other abnormalities were present in the pelvis. We were able to inject dye and demonstrate both tubes were normal with free spilling of dye. Hopefully this will establish a normal cycles over the next three months. See you in October."

I thought it was nice of him to send us a letter to let us know everything was good and to wish us luck that it works out. I was surprised to know that each ovaries was drilled TEN times. I thought it was ten total, my poor ovaries, no wonder I was in so much pain. I think to myself how little the ovaries really are, they must look like Swiss cheese now.

This month is my birthday month so as I blow out my candles on my cake this year I am only wishing for one thing. THAT GOD BLESSES US WITH A CHILD!! I have faith he will do it on his own time and hopefully this is the right time. I was thinking to myself "What women actually wishes to get her period??" LOL!!! Me I guess!!

On a little side note...I know that there are like 100-150 people who look at my blog each time I post something! I would really like to know who is all looking..but there is no way of knowing this. So I was wondering if you wont mind signing your name to this posting or leaving a comment so I know who is look and I am not waisting my time writing this blog?!?!? If you don't feel comfortable with me knowing that is fine too...Just thought it would be nice to know who our followers are!! Thank You!!!!

As always keep us in your thoughts and prayers!! ~Love The Lange's

3 little incisions

3 little incisions seem like nothing..haha..was I wrong! I went to the surgery center on Wednesday nervous as can be praying and hope this all works out for us. The nervous grow strong and strong as I sat there waiting for the doctor to come. (who was hour late) The time came for me to walk my little nervous butt in the room and lay on the bed and hope everything was going to be A okay! Surgery was great it took about 2 hours from the time they started until the time we left there. Everything looked great and they drilled about 5 different spot in each ovary! The picture below is and idea of what they did!! (sorry if you have a weak tummy)

I woke up crabby (who would have thought) and kind of snippy with the poor nurse. She said to me "Vanessa can you open your eyes now,it is time to have something drink." I said to her "Well yea I can open my eyes..but I don't want to!" I also thought I would be a good idea in my dazed moments to let her know that the stickers for the heart monitor HURT when you pulled them off a "fat girl!!!!"

We were on our home after about an hour for sipping on some juice and listening to the nurse tell us what to do when we get home and showing us the pictures of what they had done for the day! Thursday and Friday were kind of a blur to me, I would fall asleep with someone talking to me. Marley(our dog) and I took many naps though out the day!

I started to get a little nervous on Friday that I was running out of pain pills and I still had the whole weekend left. So I called the nurse and she told me that I was suppose to be switching Motrin and the pain med every other time. Well I guess when I have a child someone other then Tuna will have to be in there listing to what they say. I always thought that he just blocked me out when I talk!! hahaha...JK!!

Sunday everything was starting to feel really good..I had not taken any meds for the day. I was going to see how the day went because I was suppose to go back to work on Monday night. Well Tuna and I went to Walmart to get a few things and I carried the laundry soap and that was not such a great idea. We got to my Mother and Father-in-laws house and my mother-in-law asked to see my incisions, when I lifted up my shirt there was blood running for my belly button. I called my sister-in-law to come over and take a peek! She helped me clean it out and told me I should call the ER and just ask them what I should do.

I called Litchfield ER and told them the hole story and the lady told me to call Willmar and see what they say about. Well needless to say I went to the Willmar Urgent Care and they cleaned it all up and the doctor told me that she could see straight into my belly. It makes me legs and arms weak to even type it. So it busted open and I am suppose to just keep it clean and make sure it doesn't get infected.

So hopefully I will be returning to work on Wednesday and I pray to God that I get my period on my own at the end of August!! I would like to say Thank You to everyone who checked up on me or called mother! As always keep us in your prayers and thoughts that this surgery will grant us with the child that we deserve! ~Love The Lange's

As tomorrow approaches

My stomach is in knot and my mind is going crazy in fear/happiness!! I fear the worst because when it comes to this part in our lives it never seems to work out just quite how we wished it would. I am scared to know there is a possibility that this might be it for us. I mean if the doctor goes in there and finds something that will prevent us from having children I am not quite sure how I would handle something like that!

I know I know...I should be thinking of the good things that could come out of this. It is sooo hard to be positive when it always seems to be negative news!! I hope and pray that the doctor will be on his 'A' game tomorrow and that everything works out!! I have faith and believe that God has a plan!!

My surgery will be at noon tomorrow afternoon in Willmar at the Surgery Center. It should take about 2 hours but could take up to 4 hours. I will have someone hopefully blog tomorrow. I might even be me..it depends how I feel I guess. I would love for everyone to say a little extra prayer for Tuna and I tomorrow!! ~Love The Lange's

1 week to go!!

I have one week until my surgery, and I am starting to get really scared about it. I have been thinking to myself "This could be it...It could really work for us!!" I mean what if this actually works!! I find myself thinking about the time when I actually can call everyone and tell them good news for once!! I mean I have dreamed about becoming pregnant for SOOOOOO long now, it actually for once feels like just maybe the dream is not out of reach!!

I still have not heard for the place where I am going to have the surgery done on what time it will be!! So as soon as I know more, I will be posting something!!

FYI the day of the surgery I will be having either my mom or my husband posting about how everything went!! So bear with whom every writes something on here!! LOL!! They will be "new" blogger!! ~ Love The Lange's

Surgery is set!

The appointment today went good! It was the first time in a long time that I didn't have a falling apart moment in or after see the doctor!! :) The surgery day will be on July,21 and not really sure of the time yet I have to wait for the surgery center to call me. I am extremely nervous to have this done,but excited at the same time. I hope this drilling works and that I can get my cycle back to "normal" on my own!! The doctor told me that it is a like a 50%-60% chance this the drilling will cause me to get my period on my own and ovulate!! Keeping my fingers and toes crossed!!

The doctor told me this this surgery will take about 3-4 hours and I will be going home the same day weather or not they find anything will doing the surgery!! They will be looking to make sure there are no cyst or scar tissue! They also will be doing an ovarian drilling. The drilling is done laparoscopy and they use a laser needle and puncture my ovary 4 to 10 times. In doing this procedure it should dramatically lower the male hormones. This surgery could be VERY helpful!!

Thankz to everyone for being here for me when I need you guys the most!! ~Love The Lange's

Selfish or not?!?!?!

I have thought long and hard about the about the journey I am about to embark on! I have decided to go ahead with the surgery and the series of shots. The reason I decided to do it is because in reality this is our only option. The In-Vitro is out of our price range.

So the surgery would entail a laparoscopic ovarian drilling and to have them look in my body to make sure everything looks okay. If they happened to find something then they will take care of it right then and there. If everything goes as planned then I will be leaving the same day. The reason for doing the drilling is because 80% of the time it will trigger ovulation!

If the drilling doesn't make me ovulate on my own, then there is another thing we can try. This would be the series of shots, which is VERY high risk. I do/would feel kind of selfish using the shots. The reason is because I think to myself that with the shots there is a 90% chance that you would become pregnant with MORE then twins. This is extremely scary for me to think about. I already have high blood pressure and the more kids you have in your body they higher you blood pressure gets. I am just scared that i will have to make some really hard choices if worst comes to worst. But I can't let that stop me from moving forward. Life is not easy, so why would this be easy...right????

I will be going to the doctor this coming Friday 9th to talk about my option and set everything up. So I will know more about all this then!! Keep me in your prayers and thoughts on Friday!! ~ Love The Lange's